


Tequila Makes Her Clothes Fall Off

by Arbryna



Category: Legend of the Seeker
Genre: Alcohol, Drunken Confessions, F/F, Kahlan is slutty when she's drunk, Kink Meme, Masturbation, One Shot, Smut
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2011-12-08
Updated: 2011-12-08
Packaged: 2017-10-27 01:54:54
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,489
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/290388
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Arbryna/pseuds/Arbryna
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>In which Kahlan underestimates the effects of alcohol.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Tequila Makes Her Clothes Fall Off

**Author's Note:**

> Title from Joe Nichols, "Tequila Makes Her Clothes Fall Off".

Kahlan, Cara has discovered, cannot hold her liquor.

It's the only tavern in the first town they've come across since the Pillars of Creation, and the owner had been only too happy to offer them accommodations for the night and as much ale as they could drink.

Cara has never seen Kahlan drink before; Kahlan always opted out in the past, citing her need to maintain control over her power. But tonight was different, Richard had argued, and Kahlan had reluctantly given in. One drink, she said.

That was nearly two hours and roughly five mugs of ale ago, and it has become obvious that Kahlan severely underestimated the effect that the alcohol would have on her.

“I'm gonna go get s'more drinks,” she slurs, pushing herself up from the table and stumbling up to the bar. Cara huffs, watching with an expression somewhere between amusement and concern.

“Lighten up, Cara,” Richard mumbles into his mug. “You're s'posed to be celebrating.”

Cara follows his gaze to her own mostly-full mug, then back at him. “Someone has to stay alert, to make sure you don't drown yourselves in ale.”

Across the room, Kahlan's laughter rings out sharply. Cara looks over to see the Confessor leaning heavily on one of the barmaids. Her hand is hanging farther down over the woman's shoulder than is necessary, and Cara cannot hear her words, but the way she leans in to murmur in the barmaid's ear raises a warning flag in Cara's mind. She has been around enough inebriated people to recognize the more...amorous effects of alcohol.

To Kahlan's dismay, the barmaid is well aware of who and what she is; she shrugs Kahlan's hand off with a fearful glance, scurrying to the other side of the tavern. When Kahlan returns to the table with a fresh mug of ale, her lips are twisted into an obstinate pout.

“Well she was no fun,” Kahlan sulks, taking a long pull from her mug. “She had really pretty eyes, though. Reminded me of yours, Richard.”

She wraps an arm around Richard's waist as she rests her head on his shoulder, dropping little kisses on his neck and jaw. It would seem that she likes this better than the ale, because her other hand drops away from the mug to rest on his leg, sliding close to his crotch -

And then his head hits the table with a loud thunk as he passes out. Cara smirks as Kahlan huffs in exasperation, shoving at his shoulder in irritation.

Then Kahlan turns her attention to the other side of her, where Zedd is _still_ stuffing his face. “At least I still have my Zedd,” she sighs happily, snuggling into his shoulder. Zedd gives her a cursory glance and a distracted smile before turning back to his food.

He soon forgets his food, however, when Kahlan turns her head to sniff at his robes. “You smell good,” Kahlan murmurs softly. When she starts walking her fingers seductively up his arm, Cara nearly chokes on her ale.

“That's it,” she says firmly, slamming her mug down onto the table. Richard pops awake for a moment, mumbling incoherently before pulling his mug close and nuzzling it in his sleep. Kahlan turns her head sharply to look at Cara, and sways a little when her vision blurs at the sudden movement. Cara stands, moving around the table to tug at Kahlan's arm. “I think you've had enough.”

Zedd breathes a sigh of relief as Cara pulls Kahlan to her feet – and safely out of sniffing distance. “I'll make sure Richard gets to his room safely,” he offers gratefully. Cara nods, her attention focused on the inebriated Confessor.

Kahlan is putting up a fight. “I'm the Mother Confessor,” she says indignantly, stumbling as she tries to extricate her arm from Cara's grip. “I'm in charge, and I say when I've had enough.”

Cara grits her teeth, sliding her other arm around Kahlan's waist to guide her forcibly toward the stairs. “You're in charge of the Midlands, _Mother Confessor_ ,” she says pointedly as she helps Kahlan begin to climb. “We're in D'Hara. You'll do as I tell you.”

“But Richard is Lord Rahl, not you,” Kahlan argues as she trips her way up the stairs. Suddenly, she stops, and Cara has to grip the handrail to keep her balance. “Where are we going?” Kahlan asks, her eyes squinting in confusion.

“I'm taking you to bed, Kahlan,” Cara explains in exasperation, nudging Kahlan further up the stairs. When they reach the top, Kahlan pulls away from Cara, looking affronted.

“Really, Cara, I thought better of you,” she says accusingly, wincing as she hits her shoulder on a door frame. She'll have a bruise later. “Dragging me upstairs to have your way with me. You could have at least bought me a drink first.”

“You don't need any more drinks.” Cara rolls her eyes, reaching for Kahlan's arm again. “I'm taking you to your room, Confessor, where I will put you to bed so you can sleep this off.”

Kahlan's face scrunches up as she tries to process this new information. Before she realizes what's happening, Cara has pulled her through the door to her room. “But I'm not tired,” she protests belatedly as Cara closes the door behind them.

“Believe me, you need to sleep,” Cara says firmly, pulling Kahlan's daggers from her boots as a precautionary measure; sharp, pointy objects are probably not the best thing for her to have right now. She moves over to place them on the farthest flat surface from the bed, before turning to look at Kahlan. “You should undress,” she suggests carefully. “That can't be comfortable to sleep in.”

The suggestion sparks something in Kahlan's ale-soaked brain, and a slow smile spreads over her lips. “You want me to take my clothes off?” she asks in a husky voice, her fingers coming up to undo the laces of her jacket as she stumbles seductively toward Cara.

Cara sighs in frustration as the jacket hits the ground. “Kahlan, I'm not trying to seduce you.”

“Why not?” The crestfallen look on Kahlan's face causes Cara to roll her eyes again.

“Because you're drunk,” she says matter-of-factly, stepping forward to place her hands on Kahlan's shoulders. “And you're my friend,” she adds grudgingly. “And I don't need to get my friends drunk in order to find pleasure.”

Kahlan's pout softens as her fingers come up to trail along the low neckline of Cara's leather. “You're so sweet,” she slurs, leaning in closer. Cara scoffs. “You deserve a reward,” she says mischievously, her fingers dipping into Cara's cleavage. “I know how I can reward you.”

A gloved hand comes up to snatch Kahlan's wandering fingers away from her cleavage. “Make the offer when you're sober, and maybe I'll take you up on it,” she purrs, sliding around Kahlan to make quick work of her corset. It's clear Kahlan isn't going to be cooperative, and the sooner she gets her into bed and gets away from her the better. Maybe she can go find that barmaid Kahlan spooked; she really was quite attractive.

“It's not just because I'm drunk, you know,” Kahlan sulks as Cara strips the corset off and goes to work on her skirt. “I still want you other times.”

Cara's breath catches in her throat as she lets the skirt fall to the ground. Kahlan is drunk. That's the only reason she'd say something like that.

Kahlan turns around, sliding her hands up to Cara's neck. “It's true,” she says, her hands cradling Cara's face. Her eyes are suddenly glistening with emotion, and Cara tenses uncomfortably. “I don't want to hurt Richard, but I can't stop the feelings I have for you.” Her chin trembles as tears start to spill from her eyes. “I'm a bad person,” she sniffles, wrapping her arms around herself as she walks over to sit on the edge of the bed.

Sighing, Cara closes her eyes, gathering her strength before moving to kneel in front of Kahlan. “You are _not_ a bad person, Kahlan,” she says firmly as she tugs off the thigh-high boots and tosses them to the side. Standing again, she gently guides her to lie back on the bed, pulling the blanket over her. “You're drunk, and you need sleep.”

“I don't want to sleep,” Kahlan pouts, blue eyes glistening with tears as she looks up at Cara. “You don't believe me.”

Cara's hand drifts to her side, clenching around an agiel. “Of course I believe you,” she says indulgently. “But now is not the time to discuss it.”

Kahlan's eyes brighten at that. “But we can later?”

Inhaling deeply, Cara acquiesces. “Yes. Later. If you'll go to sleep now,” she grinds out.

“Okay,” Kahlan agrees, nuzzling her head back into her pillow. Then Cara turns to leave, and Kahlan reaches out to grab her wrist. “Stay with me?” she pleads when Cara turns back to her.

It's a bad idea. Cara is still reeling from Kahlan's admission, whether it's true or not, and it's hard enough to control her feelings for the Confessor when they're both fully clothed. But it's Kahlan, and Cara can never seem to say no to her.

“Fine.” She tries to tug her wrist free so she can go sit in the chair at the desk, but Kahlan doesn't let go. Cara's eyes widen. “You want me to get in there with you?”

Kahlan nods, her eyes wide and imploring. “There's plenty of room,” she says, gesturing to the empty half of the bed. “I don't want to be alone.”

Cara huffs, rolls her eyes, tries to think of a reason, any reason, to avoid doing this. Finally she gives up and nods. Kahlan releases her wrist, and she pulls her agiels from their holsters, placing them next to Kahlan's daggers before climbing onto the bed. She stays on top of the covers, and lies flat on her back at the very edge of the bed, but she still can't get her mind off of the fact that Kahlan is lying next to her, naked except for her smallclothes and the blanket covering her.

Sighing contentedly, Kahlan scoots closer, slinging an arm over Cara's stomach as she nuzzles into her neck. Then nuzzling turns to soft kisses trailing up her jaw, and Cara stiffens.

“You're supposed to be sleeping.”

A warm tongue flicks out to tease at Cara's earlobe. “I told you before, I'm not tired,” Kahlan says before sucking the soft flesh into her mouth.

Cara manages to catch Kahlan's wandering hand before it closes over her breast. “And I told you, I'm not going to take advantage of you,” she says through her teeth. “If you want to touch someone, touch yourself.”

Then Kahlan's heat is gone, and Cara has to restrain the part of her that is desperate to pull her back. She stares at the ceiling, refusing to look over; she's sure Kahlan is sulking again, and really, she's done everything she can think of short of giving in and screwing her senseless – and she doesn't think Kahlan would approve of that solution, once she sobers up.

A soft moan alerts Cara to the fact that Kahlan is not, in fact, sulking. Her eyes widen in shock as she looks over to see that Kahlan has taken her suggestion, as evidenced by the rapid movements of her hand under the blanket. She squeezes her eyes shut, trying to ignore the throbbing between her legs as Kahlan makes little panting noises next to her.

“Cara,” Kahlan whimpers, and Cara opens her eyes to look over at her. Kahlan's face is scrunched up in determination, and as Cara watches, she pulls her bottom lip between her teeth, biting down as her hand moves faster between her legs.

She should feel guilty for watching this, but Cara tells herself that she's really not doing anything wrong; she's done everything she can to preserve Kahlan's virtue. And Kahlan probably won't even remember this in the morning.

Kahlan's lip springs free from her teeth as she moans loudly, her hips jerking at a frenzied pace. Suddenly it occurs to Cara that this is the perfect opportunity to indulge her curiosity about something; as Kahlan edges closer to release, Cara tugs off one of her gloves, pressing her bare fingers against a naked shoulder as Kahlan arches off the bed. Kahlan is too far gone to notice.

It's too dark in the room to see it, but Cara knows that Kahlan's eyes are turning black, her magic flooding her senses before tearing free of her restraint. It slams into Cara, and for a terrifying moment she's sure her gamble is going to backfire on her. But then, inexplicably, the magic lets go of her, draining from her body as though it was never there.

Well, that answers that question.

Cara can't help the satisfied smirk that pulls at her lips as she removes her hand, returning to her earlier position. “Feel better now?” she asks as Kahlan's breathing evens out.

“Mmhmm,” Kahlan hums sleepily, curling onto her side to face Cara.

“Good,” Cara replies, fixing her gaze on the ceiling as her mind races.

“Cara?” Kahlan asks in a small voice, and Cara rolls her eyes as she turns to look at her. “Can I kiss you?”

Her first instinct is to refuse, and Kahlan seems to sense that, because she cuts Cara off before she can speak.

“Just one kiss,” she pleads, looking imploringly at Cara.

Cara sighs. “Just one kiss, and then you'll go to sleep?”

Kahlan nods solemnly. “I promise.”

Swallowing nervously, Cara turns onto her side, propping herself up on an elbow in a mirror of Kahlan's position. Kahlan smiles brightly, and for a moment Cara forgets that Kahlan is drunk, and probably doesn't mean any of this.

Finding it best just to get it over with, Cara leans in, stopping just before their lips meet. Smiling shyly, Kahlan closes the distance, pressing her mouth softly to Cara's. Cara inhales sharply through her nose as the contact sends sparks down her spine. Kahlan's hand comes up to rest against Cara's cheek, and Cara can smell Kahlan's arousal drying on her fingertips as a warm tongue swipes hesitantly over her lips.

The ale doesn't come close to overcoming the powerful taste of Kahlan's tongue, and Cara moans into her mouth as her free hand slides over Kahlan's hip, pulling their bodies tightly together.

It's only when the need for air overpowers her desire that Kahlan breaks the kiss, chastely pressing her lips to Cara's before pulling away completely. “Thank you,” she says, smiling sleepily as she lowers her head to her pillow. She's asleep within seconds.

Cara flops breathlessly onto her back, her pulse racing in her ears. When she recovers her wits, she glares over at the slumbering Confessor.

“You are _never_ drinking again.”

  
_end._   



End file.
